psychokinesia | sticksandbones ◉ Inbox

[He scowls harder, somehow finding new ways to be put off by Wolfwood's reaction... does he have to say it like that? Like it's some ridiculous, idiotic answer? Like he thinks this has to be some kind of fucking joke?

Somehow, his annoyance loops right back around into confidence. Add stands up straight, lashing out because he can't process his emotions in any other way.]

What, was that not loud enough for you? Do you want me to shout it from the fucking roof? Yeah, jackass, I'm jealous. I look away for five fucking minutes, and the next thing I know Ain has been dating up to four total strangers for months in some alternate dimension backwater town, and oh! He had a fucking crush on me the whole time, and I never noticed! And I'm just supposed to shrug all that shit off like it's no big deal?

You piss me off, and you keep sticking your nose in my business, like you just have to bother with me because I'm Ain's friend and you're sooooo thoughtful! That kind of fake shit grates on my nerves, and you're still pulling this shit off better than me! Even now, you came to me first—!

[He's getting worked up enough to start sparking, and it seems like he's just gonna keep going like this until he explodes... but then there's a firm but gentle bebeep! from Dynamo next to him. Add pauses, considering this for a moment... then huffs loudly, reeling it back.

He's supposed to be not starting fights here... keep it to together, dumbass. For Ain's sake.]

So, go ahead and laugh or whatever. You win. Congratulations.

Edited (correction,) 2025-04-26 04:05 (UTC)

[Add starts shouting, and…Wolfwood honestly can’t say he wasn’t expecting it to come to this. They just cannot talk without it, but better to happen behind closed doors in private than as a knock-down, drag-out scuffle in the middle of the god damn family meeting. He lets Add say his piece, and it’s nothing kind. But…it does tell Wolfwood a lot about where Add has been mentally this whole time. When Add screams that his concern is fake, it finally clicks that Add doesn’t actually mean it the way he says it. It’s just easier to process when it’s hurled like an insult, spat like venom, because at least this he can control. Maybe, if he can put Wolfwood down, he’ll feel just a little bit better, somehow.

He gets that. It’s easier for him to handle fighting, and anger, and all of that than it is to deal with real feelings. But, he’s also been here long enough- through enough awful fights- to know that if you want any relationship to work, you have to talk real shit eventually. It even came to this with Flamebringer, and now look where they are.

So he stands still, letting Add go until he has nothing else left to say. Then, he works his jaw, bringing a hand up to rub over his stubble as he sighs through his fingers.]

I don’t want to win. None of this has ever been about “winning”.

[Wolfwood closes his eyes for a moment, then leans back a little heavier against the wall. If they’re working…any of this out, they have to be honest, right? If Add is doing it, Wolfwood needs to meet him in the middle.]

Ain has done nothing but miss you and your friends since the day he got here. You showin’ up made him…so fucking happy. [He shakes his head a little.] But you’d say shit to upset him, and it’d make me…defensive, I guess. Not ‘cause I think I’m better than you, but because I’ve been the guy on that end plenty of times now. You just ain’t been here to see how many times I’ve fucked it with my partners. I ain’t some all-knowing relationship guru who knows exactly what to say or do. Half the time, I open my mouth and say the wrong thing even if I ain’t tryin’ to. I’m an asshole. I lie, I hurt people…and unlike you and Ain, I ain’t the hero of my story.

[He glances off to the side, then, brows furrowing.]

So yeah, you’ve been right about one thing. I ain’t a good boyfriend. But that don’t mean I haven’t been tryin’. […] And I wouldn’t be here if I didn’t care to make things right. I’m not tryin’ to take him away from you. I want him to be happy. Not much in this place makes him happy anymore.

And, honestly, I want you to be happy too.

[Part of him really was expecting mockery here. He doesn't know Wolfwood, and that sigh at the start... he's ready to be called a disappointment, too, but that doesn't come either.

It's... familiar, in a weird way. It's so convenient he almost wants to call it bullshit. How could Wolfwood of all people know how Add feels? But it's not like he read Add's mind before deciding what to say, and his abrasive personality speaks for itself. The same type of abrasive behaviour that always seems to get Add into shit... isn't that why Wolfwood is always getting on his nerves? Doesn't this just make sense?

(He bites his tongue not to comment on the "hero" part. That's not really important right now, anyway.)

... but even if they're similar, it's obvious from this that Wolfwood has his shit together and Add just... doesn't. Even this Wolfwood beats him at? He can say all that disgustingly honest shit and still end it with "I want you to be happy, too"?]

Ugh, give me a break. I don't need your fucking pity party. [This whole day has been exhausting. He sits down in the air, dynamos rearranging to make a seat for him.]

This is about Ain, so as long as he's happy with it... we don't have to like each other, so you can stop adding pointless clauses on top.

[Wolfwood…should not have expected a more eloquent answer, if he’s honest, but BOY if it doesn’t make him want to pick Add up and throw him from the window. Just smash cut to a comical glass crashing sound, end thread. That isn’t what happens, but he sure does visualize it for a moment to keep himself from saying something he shouldn’t.]

I am not pitying you, you dick. Fucking Christ.

[SIGH. CALM DOWN. Wolfwood unfolds his arms and lifts both hands, presses them to his face, and slowly drags them down. He takes a few slow, deep breaths, then turns his attention back to Add once more.]

Look. We need to talk to Ain. Together. And we need to be honest with him ‘bout what’s been goin’ on, otherwise you and I can kiss ever talkin’ to him again goodbye. Are you prepared to do that?

[He grumbles, but seems to accept Wolfwood's honesty only after he tacks an insult onto it. Yeah, Add is just like this. He leans back into his dynamo-chair, taking a deep, calming breath of his own (if Wolfwood notices sparks then that's normal, nothing like a bit of electrotherapy to soothe the nerves).

This isn't about "winning" or who's better or more deserving... this is about Ain. And Ain wants them to get along.

... and he wanted to know why. The idea of further honesty makes Add hesitate, anxiety creeping back in. Some details are necessary for this apology plan to work, sure, but...]

He doesn't have to know everything that's been going on.

... I know I don't have much of a leg to stand on, but the past is the past. There's lots of shit I've done that Ain doesn't have to know about. [add that sounds so much worse??????] I made a miscalculation, and you almost died because of my error. I never intended to put you at real risk, so... I'm sorry.

[The last part is mumbled like it physically pains him to say this out loud, but he does mean it, so at least he's trying...?]

[The very last thing Wolfwood was expecting to hear come from Add’s mouth was an apology. He looks up, his tense expression turning more to the side of confusion, then a sort of mixed acceptance at first like he feels like there might be some sort of catch. But…even for all his faults, he can tell by the tone of his voice that he’s being genuine. Maybe for the first time ever.

He exhales through his nose, wishing very much he had more cigarettes to smoke. Probably for the best he doesn’t, considering.]

…it’s fine. But that’s kindof what I wanted to talk about.

[Sorry to put the fear of God in you Add but here goes!!!]

I ain’t talkin’ ‘bout whatever you’ve got goin’ on back in Elrios. I mean more…the shit that’s happened between us. There’s this…sometimes, either if it’s the false god or some other shit happening, people’s memories get shared. You can’t control what gets shared, or who sees it…but if he were to get that kind of info second hand? He’d be fucking pissed we didn’t tell him.

[Genuine, if extremely anxious. He's less anxious once Wolfwood says it's fine... just, y'know, not for very long, since he follows that up with the omniscient threat of having his secrets broadcast to the entire Grove.

That is a concern. Add stares in blank horror for several seconds before deciding to just. not fucking think about the implications of that, for now, he has enough to worry about with just the Grove stuff.]

Ugh, that's— easy for you to say, when you don't have anything to lose from it! He's already pissed, what do you think's gonna happen when he hears you almost died because of me?!

[what if Ain decides that's too far and he hates Add and he never speaks to him again and he has to go through all this bullshit honesty with Wolfwood only to end up with nothing]

I know. I know. Trust me, I get it. But if he were to find out any other way, I don’t…

[He shakes his head a little, pinching the bridge of his nose. He can’t believe he’s saying this, but…]

I’ll back you up, okay? I know it wasn’t on purpose. You wouldn’t do that on purpose, even if you don’t like me. It ain’t like you knew the place was gonna blow like that.

[Sure, Ain won’t be HAPPY Add locked him in the cell, but like…that part can be glossed over.]

How do I know you're not just trying to set me up?! You've been way too fucking forgiving up to now, there's no way it can be that simple! If I run the calculations—

[if he runs the calculations then it's still way worse if Ain finds out another way. It's a lose-lose scenario whether he goes with Wolfwood's idea or not.

Add hisses through his teeth, trying to reel his emotions back in again... he has to stay focused. Look at this logically. Find the solution.]

... Maybe he won't ask for specifics. We can say we fought, and there were non-fatal injuries, but we both talked it out and it's fine now. Those details aren't really important, right? It's about moving on from our disagreements, not explaining every incident blow by blow.

If I was trying to set you up, wouldn’t this be a pretty damn convoluted way to go about it?

[Not to mention fucked up and cruel, even for him. Wolfwood’s brows furrow, his good foot tapping anxiously against the floor.]

You…you know Ain better than I do. [Which is a HUGE thing to admit, but it’s really true.] If you told it to him that way…and then he was to see the whole memory later. Do you genuinely think he wouldn’t be mad that you left out details, and softened the reality to save his feelings?

Cause I’ve done that. I’ve been tryin’ to do that. …and it’s only made him… […] …not trust me, anymore.

[This would be a really bad time to bring up how he feels like he doesn't know Ain anymore because he's changed so much and grown for the better and maybe whatever Add thinks isn't going to be right anymore... yeah. okay. keeping those particular thoughts locked up in his brain, no one but Mizuki needs to know that right now I guess.

With his hands gripping his knees, the armrest dynamos have also started to fidget. There has to be something they can do besides tell the whole-ass truth...]

Maybe... we at least break it into chunks... we don't have to tell him everything at once. [but won't that raise further questions if they say they had a fight but insist on talking about it another time? That'll just keep him mad at them until they get around to explaining it.] Or we precede and follow it with something positive. Sandwich the bad news with two pieces of good news. It's a proven effective strategy.

Maybe... maybe, if we say something even worse happened, and then surprise him by admitting it wasn't that bad, he'll be distracted by a theoretically worse scenario and be too relieved to be upset about it? Like I did try to kill you on purpose, or you almost killed me back— [please god stop him from trying to make their problems worse]

[By the time Add is well into his stressed rambling, Wolfwood just has this…look on his face, one that grows with each passing second, until finally he steps away from the wall.]

Add. Are you even listening to what you’re sayin’?

[Wolfwood is bad with social interactions and dealing with emotions, but he’s nowhere near the level of Add’s self-sabotage, holy shit.]

We need to be honest. That’s it. It fucking sucks! I know it does! I get it! If I could, I would just not tell him or, fuck, anyone anything if it meant not havin’ to deal with a hard conversation, but we’ve dug our grave with this and we gotta lay in it.

[Wolfwood can’t believe these words are coming out of his own mouth, but…that’s what therapy and multiple divorces will do for you, he guesses.]

Ain…is gonna be happier with us if we just give him the straight facts. He’s going to be pissed either way, but did you forget he’s pissed at us now? Ezell told me he don’t even want to speak to either of us. He’s not even here in the city anymore.

[He has to look away then, because he can feel guilt creeping in to color his features again. Shame.]

It don’t matter how we tell him, just that we do. We need to apologize and mean it this time. This ain’t somethin’ you can plan out every little detail for. You just…

[Fuck. He shucks a hand through his hair, shaking his head again.]

Gotta trust that he’ll understand. He’s your friend, ain’t he? Do you honestly think that he’d throw you away like that? Do you think he’s that kind of person?

[At least he looks embarrassed for it once Wolfwood starts reprimanding him like a dog, but... he asks a question that should have an obvious answer, and Add hesitates.

Sometimes, he still wonders when the other shoe will drop.

But then Add looks away, schooling his expression back into something vaguely irritated. This isn't the time,] I just don't want to fuck it up, alright? I want to at least have a plan, doesn't have to be a perfect one...

[... Wolfwood really keeps hammering it in, though. Honesty is the only option that works in the long term, even if it might mean some short-term consequences... Add deflates, leaning forward to let his head hang over the gap between his knees. Ughh.]

... if I replace more of my organs, stress response from rejection won't be as bad... [add no what the fuck???]

Maybe don’t start replacin’ your organs until after we’ve talked to him. What the fuck.

[Like. Are ALL Adds like this?????

Sighs.

Wolfwood once again rubs a hand down the unscarred side of his face, fingers lingering over his stubble.]

I ain’t sayin’ to not have a plan at all, that’s why we’re havin’ this talk to begin with. But you can’t overthink it.

[He says to man who famously overthinks EVERYTHING.]

We can sleep on it too, but…I don’t wanna wait too long.

[Add mutters something to himself that might've been human stomachs are overrated, I could digest platinum if I upgraded but he wisely decides this is not a hill worth dying on.

If he waits on it too long, he knows he'll probably find an excuse to chicken out, too... this is one of those times where he just has to throw himself at it and hope for the best.]

... Tomorrow. We'll meet at the Grove tomorrow.

Tomorrow.

[Wolfwood confirms, letting that sink in. It’s now or never, whether this goes well…or it doesn’t.]

If there’s anything else you wanted to. I dunno. Say, before then, now’s the best time for it.

[But before Add can, assuming he was even going to, Wolfwood takes his turn to speak.]

I know we didn’t get off on the right foot. While I wasn’t lyin’ when I said I haven’t felt jealous of you bein’ here, I’ve…felt like I’ve had to prove myself, like I was worthy or whatever to be with Ain. I was bein’ defensive and taking it out on you.

So. I’m sorry.

[Oh... he thought they were done with this part already, so it's a surprise when Wolfwood goes out of his way to bring it up again. Isn't an apology at this stage kind of unnecessary?

He awkwardly stares at the wall, waiting slightly too long to come up with an answer.]

You're fine, so just forget it. [he already said the dreaded S word he is not saying it a second time] S'not like you were wrong. I was judging you the whole damn time.

…Gee, thanks.

[He loves confirmation that he’s been judged this whole time, very appreciated! Not like he hasn’t felt insecure enough about dating Ain but you know what it’s fine they have bigger things to worry about. Wolfwood will Also not be saying the S-word again so Add won’t have to worry about that.

As it stands, it sounds like Add doesn’t have more he wants to say or lay on the table, so Wolfwood will move away from the wall proper this time.]

We’ll meet in the Grove tomorrow at noon. You know how to get back, right? Ain’s prolly gonna be at his tailor shop if he isn’t at the bakery.

Tch, you had a passable score, so don't complain about it. [This is as close as he's going to get to saying "I think you're a genuinely good person who deserves to be with him" so enjoy it while it lasts.

He's kind of in the way of the door, though, so Add finally stands up with minimal help from Dynamo. He runs a hand through his hair, still awkwardly avoiding eye contact.]

Yeah, yeah, I know the way. We'll meet outside the inn and go from there. Don't be late.

Edited 2025-04-27 05:55 (UTC)

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